Memory about Khunya

 

Death is very fearful for everybody since it will bring much suffering to the body and mind. But for grandma who everyone called “Khunya”, it is just a common thing that no one can escape.

Khunya has proven that death is not at all “horrible”.

I had never seen the sign of sorrow but only the smiling face and cheerful voice of Khunya while she stayed in hospital. This made me very interested in her life. At that moment, I began to feel that it’s a pity I did not have a chance to know her before and spend more time with her.

I remembered the first time that I saw her at her eldest son’s house. Although she was very sick of liver cancer, she was still very calm. She was very different from other patients who usually express their painful feeling or cry when they suffer from serious illness especially at the last period of their life. But for Khunya, even though she was very sick of incurable disease, she still smiled and talked to everyone who came to visit her. Her appearance surprised the doctors and nurses who took care of her. The patient room where Khunya stayed until the end of life was absolutely different from others. It had the atmosphere of “peace”. Sometimes, there was the sound of chanting from Khunya and her grandchild, the sound of the monk’s preaching, the voice of Khunya and her children as well as her grandchildren talking about Dhamma and their good memories with Khunya and the sound of happy laughing. This reminded me the time when I was still young and my kind teacher told many stories and tales to us the same as Khunya did.

I had learned that both Khunya and Khunpoo (grandpa) were teachers. Good teachers must be patient and full of kindness because “teachers” are the ones who give knowledge as well as goodness and morality to students to live happily and be good citizens of the country.
Besides working as a teacher, Khunya also extended her helping hands to the children who lacked opportunity. A lot of children did not have a chance to continue their study because their families were very poor. Moreover, their houses were quite far from school. They were very fortunate to be supported by Khunya who provided accommodation for them and also took care of them as if they were her own children. She gave them love, warmth and useful advice for their happiness and success. At present, all benefit and goodness done by Khunya is seen in the form of “ Bandeg Project ”, Home and Fund for Children. It is the place of hope for children who lack opportunity to study for improving their lives.

Although Khunya and Khunpoo did not have much salary, both of them were very kind and generous especially to the children taken care by them. It is difficult to find anyone, even a millionaire, who devoted as much as Khunpoo and Khunya. Many Children supported by Khunya had successful life and work. They usually came back to visit Khunya. Khunya’s own children were the good citizens of the country. Some were government officials, some were good teachers the same as Khunya, some was a kind veterinarian, some worked very hard to develop the villagers’ quality of life. Khunya’s youngest son, Bhikku Sudhiro resigned from his very good job in the Royal Thai Army, ordained as a monk and committed to renunciation to find the real happiness and peace, help all mankind, preserve and develop Buddhism for prosperity. Khunya had strong faith in Buddhism all through her life. Her youngest son, Bhikku Sudhiro was the one who lightened her soul with the everlasting goodness of Dhamma until the last minute of her life.

When people gets older, they usually feel that they are the burden of others. They cannot, anymore, make benefit for the society. So, they live without hope and happiness.
For Khunya, the more older she became, the more love, warmth and kindness she had with her. I saw many people came to visit Khunya at her patient room in hospital including her relatives, friends, patients who stayed near Khunya’s room, doctors, and nurses, etc. I also felt very warm and peaceful when I had a chance to see her and talked to her. I was fortunate to have some time with her before she passed away. I learnt from her how to be happy. It was to be kind to yourself and others and always be helpful to everyone.

Khunya had made me realize that money is not the most important thing to make life happy. Kindness, sincerity and beneficial life will create real happiness.

Khunya passed away peacefully without any worry. She has completely done all of her duties as a good child, good wife, good mother, good teacher, good friend, good Buddhist and good citizen of the country. The most important thing is that Khunya’s life was in peace and happiness because she understood the Lord Buddha’s teaching about the Four Noble Truths which are the meaning of suffering, cause of suffering, end of suffering and the way to be free from suffering. This was clearly seen in her last period of life that she was very calm and mindful.

When her life was near the end, she looked happy among the warm and tranquil atmosphere like the last sunset that remained its charming and beautiful light. Before she passed away, still happy and conscious, she chanted and meditated with her children and grandchildren.

Khunya’s picture in her Funeral looked so happy. I believed that all of her goodness would lead her to the very peaceful and happy place in her next destination.

From the past until now, I have seen many people who struggled for happiness in life by trying to serve their own desire but could not manage to receive real happiness. Happiness will be given in return if we made our life worthwhile by having the will to give good things to other people.

No one cried at the time of Khunya’s death. I saw Bhikku Sudhiro close his eyes softly and calmly, with a little smile on his face, to express his adoration to Khunya, the beloved mother of him and everyone.

Written by Bhikku Pabhassaro
English version by Natalie Daranand

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Khunya - means grandmother , Khunpoo - means grandfather, which people always call Bhikkhu Sudhiro’s parents.